January 15, 2010
To my dearest brother Caleb, and my good friend Josh,
You two are people that I spend a significant amount of time wishing I could be like. And I wished again today.
I know in a way you both know the feeling, the feeling of high because something is new—the joy in seeing people differently. That’s the feeling I have today.
It’s our first day in Kawasoti, we arrived last night and woke this morning to something new. New room, new people, new breakfast table, new coffee, new thoughts, new cold weather, new definition of time.
It’s crazy what all has gone on today. Like how cold the showers were this morning. And how weird it is to have to walk to an Internet café to be able to check Facebook—if it will even load. Sometimes it doesn’t, or there’s not electricity. Either one.
Then there are how many people I met today, and how many of them looked at me with big eyes as they sat on the floor, men on one side, women on the other, like I had something important to tell them. When the conference stared they welcomed us with so much hospitality, putting lei’s around our necks, and huge ‘winner’ nametags on our jackets. We were even given chairs to sit in. I felt so different.
That’s when it happened. That’s when I started wishing. I wished I could go up to those guys who were my age and say hi, I wished I wanted to talk to people. I wished to be the same and have to sit on the floor. I wished for the courage to just go and sit on the floor.
I will always be amazed at how you, Josh, can make someone feel like a million dollars because you care enough to give a 30 second amount of time that makes people know they have a friend in this world. I will always stand in awe of how cool it is, Caleb that you can make people feel so comfortable around you they forget 11 hours and 45 minutes and several thousands of miles separate you. And for both of you, I wish I could see people so much for who they really are, I would choose to love no matter my own fears.
So tonight when we went on a walk to this great little café and drank the best Nepali tea and I failed epically at talking to and encouraging our host, I thought of you guys. If I could pick the courage of two people in this world, I would pick yours. And if I could ask for a bigger heart I would ask for the heart you guys have.
I miss you both today.